Last wish

Lots of things had happen in the last weeks here...the turmoil created by the violence here has reached a point where people are really trying to make a something...at somepoint this has touched everyone in some level...lost two friends that I knew from years, have watched people killed in front of my eyes, mothers crushed by the lost of their children...Death is around us...
A friend of mine just sent me a poem written to the Death,as if we wanted to ask her to stop her work here. Maybe just a last wish, just to these non-sense to stop.

IF THE DEATH

BY Miguel Huezo Mixco

If the death comes and asks for me
please tell her
to return tomorrow
that I have not canceled my debts yet
have not finished a poem
have not said goodbye to anyone
have not packed my things for the journey
have not delivered a promise
have not locked my drawer
have not said what I must say to my friends
have not smelled the unborn rose yet
have not revived my roots
have not written the last letter
and I have not washed my hands yet
have not known my child
have not started to walk to unknown countries
have not navigated the seven seas
have not heard the sailor's song
If the Death comes
please tell her that I understand
and if she can wait,
that I have not given my girlfriend the last kiss
that I have not shaken my hand with my family's
have not removed the dust from the books
have not whistled the favority song
have not reconciled with the enemies
tell her I have not proved suicide
have not seen my people free
tell her, if she comes, to come back tomorrow
that is not that I am afraid of her but
I have not started to walk the road yet.

A Story of a City (One of many in this city)

This country that grows, from the ugliness, to the ugliness.
Nizzar Al Qabbani, The Balkiss poem

Sorry to start with this quote but unfortunately it is how I sense this moments, not only in this city, but in the whole country, and I am not being pessimist, but aware of the situation. I am a citizen that creates country, by paying my taxes, obaying the law, respecting others and always trying to find the common interest, and, what do I receive in change? The horror of a war, the insecurity, the death, the bullets, inocent people killed, the widows and the orphans, mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers that cry for the love ones taken from this world in a non-sense and crule violence.

A friend of mine, who lives in another city of Mexico once told me the he loves extreme sports, the he loves to feel the adrenalin on his body, that it is exciting the fear he feels everytime he is climbing up a the side of o mountain, or running down hill on a bike, when he finished talking I told him that no extreme sport can compare with living in this city. Do you really want to know how fear feels? Do you want to feel the adrenalin of knowing you might not return home in the afternoon after your work day? Come and live in Juarez. Don't come just a couple of days, don't go shopping to the others side. Live, work, walk on this streets everyday, you will run by soldiers, police men and hatchet men, young killers, almost kids, watch their faces and hands that bearly can pick up a weapon. You will realice that they don´t know anything about laws, nor human values and you will see it is like no others extreme sport.

My personal history is no different from the many others in this city. On December the 18th of 2000 my 21 year old brohter was kidnap and one week later (The worst week of our lives) he was found death on a waste land south of the city with a bullet in his head. I had to go to the forensic's office to identify the body, I saw him, motionless, with all the signs of torture, bruises on his arm, legs, face...and that smell, that stench was unbearable, like the smell of the whole city on this times...I couldn´t resist, I vomit, on my shoes, on the shoes of the doctor. Since that year of 2000 my mom, my dad, my sister and myself no longer have a good mental health. We are always watching our backs, pretending that everything is fine and trying to have a "normal" life, always hoping that justice to my brother will be served. Pretending in front of our children and grandchildren that everything is right...just for them. Of course the killer or killers of my brother are still there, free. I have try not to socialize with strangers because seems like I see the face of the people that killed my brother. Sometimes life can make you feel sick, but the worst part is when other people makes you feel that way. We have lost so many in the last couple of years, love ones, relatives, friends...all beause of the violence.

2008 and 2009 have been terrible, even more than 2000. Every death that the make headlines reminds me of my brother's. Whatever the reasons, no one deserves to die that way.

I don't know what is going to be of this city and country (don´t even know what is going to be of myself and my mental health) with all this nonstop violence, but I can imagine this city with a strong stench.

I hope for justice, and that is what keep us alive and mentally well.


La Archiduquesa del Bravo

Moon

Love the moon

JUAREZ

On patrol in Mexico's most dangerous city
By the BBC

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8362459.stm

It was November the 13th

It was supposed to be a good day, was hearing good news from work, family and friends, and was happy despite the early ceremony to honor Armando (Choco), the brave journalist killed one year ago here just because he was doing the right thing writing about the non-sense violence we live here in Juarez.
The day seemed great, wrote some essays, finally took some time to work on the pictures have been taken, getting ready to enjoy the long holiday weekend here, maybe watch the boxing fight, making plans to use an open airplane ticket bought a while ago that haven't used yet and visit relatives and friends in Mexico City, hearing from friends and how great they are doing...It was becoming a great day...Almost at the end of work was hearing of something that was happening at a Public Hospital near my workplace where some people violently irrupted trying to end the lives of other people injured early, heard all the sirens and then dozens of police running, frightened people running, but they capture those criminals, finally, something didn't end bad...I thought...God I was so wrong...

www.arrobajuarez.com

...just when I was heading towards my car received a phone called, it was my boss telling me that Alfonso Martinez Lujan was killed...Another professor from the University...Back the memories of May when Manuel Arroyo was killed...This time in front of his wife, and again many of my friend were calling trying to find out what is going on...We gather on my house that night to see what action to take again, again the frustration, the anger, the sadness...Then I saw something on the nightly news on TV that really broke my hart and soul, a live image of another execution that just happened...

www.arrobajuarez.com

...Watched a priest friend of mine next to a body covered with a blue blanket...another one...but this one was a 7 year old kid killed along with his father...and the priest broke in tears...I broke in tears and almost everyone in the room...
It was November the 13th...

Pictures 2

MOTHER


CHILD

When you believe

My time has come to do something more radical...Today's developments has make realize that Miracles can happen. It doesn't matter what you believe, we just need to do what is right, and believe in what we do is going to make a change...New task just arrive...new challenges too...Some of them are really scary, but I am not afraid...because I believe